Blazing Love Page 14

  He worried it was wrong to talk to Bonnie about Laura given Laura’s suspicions, but he needed advice.

  The phone beeped her reply. Sure.

  Laura thinks you and I are too cozy together. It made her jealous that you kissed me. She thinks I’ve only picked her as a stand-in for you, since you guys have the same body type. I don’t know what to do.

  Snips jumped to his shoulder, doing her circle thing again before settling in to lick Thayne’s hair.

  He chuckled and pet her, cocking his head sideways so she wouldn’t fall from his shoulder. He’d forgotten how weird kittens could be. Just like his little sex kitten. She was certainly acting weird.

  Instead of a return text, his phone rang, flashing Bonnie’s number on the screen.

  Thayne swiped to answer. “This involves more than a simple text answer?” he asked. “I might be in trouble.”

  “Do you think she’s wrong?” Bonnie asked.

  “About her being a stand in for you? Of course. You’re my best friend and my partner’s wife. We could never be more than friends.”

  Bonnie exhaled heavily. “And that’s the reason I’ve never told you how I felt. The other guys at the station would never forgive you for being with me. I mean, I know about your bro code, but I wish things were different.”

  Thayne was feeling slow on the uptake, but both women in his life had managed to shock him tonight with their thoughts. “What are you saying? I could never be with Carl’s wife.”

  “I know, I know. But that doesn’t mean we don’t love each other. I’ve loved you for a long time, and I would have invited you into my bed long ago, if it wasn’t for your stupid firehouse rules.”

  “You think we’re in love and should be moving this relationship to the next level? But what about Patrick?” Not to mention Laura, but it was clear Bonnie didn’t care about Laura’s feelings. How could he have been so dense? He had no clue they were anything more than friends in Bonnie’s mind. Hell, she was the one who pushed him toward Laura and told him to settle down and grow up.

  “Patrick’s a perfectly nice man,” Bonnie replied, “and I’m sure I’ll learn to be happy with him. I do love him in many ways. But that doesn’t change anything. I’m in love with you, Thayne. Have been for a long time. I always did have a thing for you, even back when you were just my second husband.”

  Gulping back surprise, Thayne’s heart dropped to his stomach. Several times over the years, Bonnie had made comments about him being her second husband because of how often he was with Carl. She even said she should get to sleep with him and double her pleasure. Carl razzed him about it, too, laughing and saying Thayne could have Bonnie when she was in a bad mood, but that Carl got all the conjugal visits. It was a joke for all of them... wasn’t it?

  She wasn’t joking now.

  “I love you too Bon, like a sister,” he emphasized. “And even though this hurts me, we can’t continue on the way we have been. I didn’t know how you felt, but we’ll never be more than friends.”

  “Don’t be that way,” she said. “You don’t even know that Laura will work out. Besides she’s right, you know. You picked a girl who looks exactly like me. What does that tell you?”

  “That Carl and I have the same taste.” Thayne sighed, wishing Laura had been irrational and wrong. He’d always been so comfortable with Bonnie, knowing it would never be anything more than a friendship because they had both loved Carl. “Laura’s who I want to be with. I hope Patrick treats you good, Bon. I want you and the kids to be happy, but I don’t love you like that. I can’t turn away from Carl’s kids, so we’ll have to work something out, but you and I can’t spend time together anymore, and definitely never alone. Marry Patrick, Bonnie, and be happy with him.”

  Before he could question it or let Bonnie talk him out of staying away from her, he lowered the phone and hit end.

  It was the right thing to do, but he had to wonder... Had he gone after Laura because she was so much like Bonnie? And if so, what did that mean for the future of their relationship?

  Chapter Nineteen

  Where will I go? I’m homeless, and now Thayne’s angry with me. Why did I have to open my big trap?

  Laura buried her face in the comforter, trying to muffle her soft sobs. The TV had turned off in the living room a while earlier. She didn’t know if Thayne had decided to sleep out there or what, but she didn’t want him overhearing her cries.

  She had tried for so many years to put on a brave façade, pretend that nothing in the world bothered her and she was strong. Some people knew it was fake, but most people accepted her at face value. After her first year of counseling following Brian’s murder, she started acting the way she wished she really was on the theory that if she pretended long enough to be strong, eventually she would be.

  Thayne had undone all that in a matter of weeks. She wasn’t strong. She wasn’t happy. She was lonely and miserable and just wanted someone to love, someone who would love her back.

  But I certainly don’t want to be a stand in for Thayne’s true love interest.

  That only made her cry more, and she bunched the comforter against her face harder, trying to make a barrier for the sound.

  “There’s no shame in crying, you know?”

  Laura startled, lowering the blanket and peering through the dark room toward the doorway. She never heard Thayne open the door. How long had he been listening to her?

  She wiped at her cheeks, trying to distance herself from the situation so she could stop her tears. “I’ve been thinking—”

  “So have I,” he interrupted. “I talked to Bonnie.”

  Well, of course you did! Why try to work things out with me when you can call your precious little Bonnie? God, why did I fall for him? I promised I’d never put myself into a position to have a broken heart again, and what did I do? Fall for a man in love with someone else.

  “I don’t want to hear about Bonnie. Let’s just forget everything,” she said softly, struggling to control her conflicting emotions. “I can sleep on the floor, but I hope you’ll let me stay here tonight. Tomorrow, I’ll find somewhere else to go.”

  “You’re planning to leave?” he asked. “Just like that? No discussions?”

  She sat up, drawing her legs to her chest. “Dr. Mason was wrong. He pushed me to start living again and let myself off the hook about Brian, but obviously I’m not rational enough to date yet.” She rested her chin atop her knees, keeping a close eye on Thayne’s dark shadow. “And I never should have spoken badly about your relationship with Carl. No matter what is happening with you and Bonnie, that’s unforgivable.”

  His dark mass separated from the doorway, coming to stand at the end of the bed. “What if I told you that you were right?”

  She froze. Right about what? You loving Bonnie or you not showing it in front of Carl? Uncertain what he meant, Laura didn’t reply.

  “Bonnie says she’s in love with me.”

  Although she suspected as much, it felt like a sharp dagger pricked into Laura’s chest, the pain so overwhelmingly strong. She attempted to breathe, but everything felt like it was collapsing inside her body, and she wanted to throw up.

  Pull it together. You’ve known this man only a few months. The world is not ending. Nothing is crushing the air from your lungs. Breathe, Laura. It’s better that you find out now.

  “Aren’t you going to say anything?” he asked, sounding irritated.

  She swallowed hard, trying to moisten her dry mouth and throat. “Just what should I say?”

  “Say that’s she’s wrong for me. Say I should pick you. Say you’re the one meant for me.”

  She bit down on the fabric of her pajamas, fighting back another sob though she felt like the weight of it would crush her. No, I won’t beg him to be with me.

  Thayne’s shadow swayed back and forth in an agitated rhythm. “Nothing?” he finally asked at a louder than normal volume. “Perfect, just freaking perfect.”

  Why is he mad?
>
  The shadow moved for the doorway.

  “Wait,” she choked out. “Why don’t you tell me what you’re thinking?” She squeezed her eyes tightly shut, not wanting to see him walk away. A small glimmer of hope still flared in her mind that he’d stay, but she tried to tamp it down.

  Still, why would he want her to beg for him if he wanted Bonnie? Thayne wasn’t some sadist who got satisfaction from hurting her.

  Suddenly, calloused hands were against her shoulders and shoved her against the headboard. Thayne’s nose crashed against hers as he made a play for her lips in the darkness. Correcting course, he kissed her long and deep, grabbing her around the neck to hold her tight, not letting her even think about escaping him.

  “What I think,” he said breathing raggedly, “is that I’m in love with you, and I don’t know what the hell to do about Bonnie or upsetting you tonight. But one thing’s for sure. I. Want. You.”

  A whimper left Laura’s throat. He picked her. She had been wrong. She clutched at his broad back, kissing at his lips and face, biting at his neck, and running her fingernails down his body.

  Frantic to be with him and lay her claim on him forever, Laura stripped his shirt over his head and threw it to the floor. He said he was in love with her. If that were true, he wouldn’t leave her for Bonnie. She had to believe him.

  Because I’m in love with him, too.

  ***

  Laura pushed him backward onto the bed, and Thayne complied with her silent demands, lying sideways across the middle. Fabric brushed against his face, and he realized she had stripped her pajamas off. Suddenly, she was astride him, the warm heat between her legs sliding across his stomach as her bare skin touched his.

  She bent over him, pushing his head to the side forcefully to kiss his neck. The feel of her sharp teeth pricking his skin excited Thayne, and his cock throbbed inside his dress slacks. Something wild had broken loose in Laura, and he liked it.

  Her perfect tits brushed against his body. Thayne grabbed them, tweaking the nipples between his thumbs and fingers with more force than he had before, trying to create the same balance between pleasure and pain for her that she had against his neck.

  She shuddered and moaned, losing hold of the suction on him. “Oh, god man, that feels good. You feel so good.”

  She rubbed herself against his stomach, the area between her legs becoming slicker and hotter with every passing second.

  Thayne trailed his hand down her body, finding her warmth with his finger. In seconds, he had her panting and arching herself against his hand.

  She rose onto her knees and fumbled behind her back, finding his button and zipper and undoing them. She moved down on the bed past where he could reach her, and eased his dick from both pants and underwear. She yanked his slacks half off, and then her mouth was around his hard length. Hot and needy, suckling as though she sought nourishment.

  Just when Thayne thought he couldn’t hold on anymore and was about to lose it in her mouth, she stopped, only to straddle him once again.

  She gripped his throbbing cock, sitting across him and impaling herself all the way up his shaft, shifting her ass back and forth and making Thayne pant with the effort of not coming yet.

  She increased the tempo, riding him hard and reaching around to fondle his balls.

  As her fingers touched his sack, he couldn’t handle it anymore. With a guttural groan, spasms overtook Thayne as he emptied himself inside her.

  She plunged onto him one last time and collapsed atop his chest, shaking and moaning.

  “I love you too, Thayne.”

  ***

  Wan light filtered into the room, and Thayne stared at Laura, wrapped safely in his arms as the sun rose outside. He knew they needed to talk more, but after they made love, they’d both fallen asleep. Knowing she loved him too was enough for now.

  It might not be enough for her though. Even in sleep, moisture leaked from her eyes, marking a path down her cheeks before falling on the pillow beneath their heads.

  With a light touch, he gently wiped the tears away. “I wish I knew what was wrong in your world, cat woman. Your dreams shouldn’t be full of tears.”

  She shifted her arm, wrapping it around his waist as her eyelids fluttered open, red and shiny with more tears. “I’m not asleep. And being with you makes it feel like nothing is wrong.”

  “Then why are you crying?” He kissed her forehead, hoping she could understand from his touch just how much he cared about her and wanted to make her happy.

  “I was thinking about Brian,” she said.

  Thayne tried not to feel jealous or upset. After all, Brian was a big part of her past. Maybe the relationship with the cop was wonderful, but everything Laura had to deal with in the aftermath of his death had been horrible and had broken her heart almost to the point of no return. Thayne wanted to take that pain away and make her whole again, make her trust in love. Even if in some ways, he’d never be able to measure up to Brian and she’d never stop thinking about her lost love, at least Thayne was here. He could make a difference in her life now and create a future with her.

  After several more seconds of silence, Thayne asked, “Do you want to talk about it?”

  She sighed, rolling to turn her back on him, grasping his hand in hers and pulling it around her body so he’d spoon her.

  Craving her touch as much as she apparently craved his, Thayne cuddled closer. He loved how her ass brushed against him, so soft and feminine. She really was the answer to his dreams. All the girls he’d wasted time on over his life seemed like so much clutter and wasted energy. Then again, perhaps all that playing around, being irresponsible and never letting himself fall for another girl had paved the way to his heart being ready for a lifetime with Laura.

  “I feel guilty,” she said softly, bringing his hand to her mouth and kissing it. “About Brian. About Bonnie. For accusing you when I had no right. Just everything. But at the same time, I’m so freaking happy, it doesn’t seem possible.”

  “Brian’s death wasn’t your fault.” Thayne would never stop reminding her of that until she finally believed it.

  “I know. His death isn’t exactly what I feel guilty about.”

  Thayne kissed the back of her neck. “Then what is?”

  “I was so young when I met Brian. We met the night of my graduation from high school. He was the officer who responded to a complaint and broke up the party I went to. It was a whirlwind romance, and he proposed to me two weeks after we first met.”

  She let out a long sigh, and Thayne wondered if she was fighting a panic attack, remembering that time in her life. However, her body wasn’t trembling, so that had to be a good sign that her panic was under control.

  “The bad part is,” she continued, “I don’t even know if I truly loved him. I knew him for less time than I’ve known you.” She shook her head softly, her hair tickling Thayne’s nose. “Is that crazy? He was so nice and sweet and good. He cared about people and wanted to make a difference in the world. I was impressed by that. And his death did devastate me, but I think my new psychiatrist is right.”

  Thayne extracted his fingers from hers so he could rub her hip, letting her know he was there for her. “Right about what?”

  “My old doctor, Dr. Preston, always assumed I was heartbroken because I lost my one true love. Dr. Mason says I’m punishing myself for having fun while Brian was dying, and that’s why I kept refusing to let myself be happy. He hasn’t said anything about me losing my true love or anything like that.” She turned again to look at him. Tears still fell down her face, but it wasn’t the sobbing, heartbroken tears she’d let loose last night. “I’m sorry Brian died, but Dr. Mason is right. I feel guilty because, as great as he was, you’re the man who was always meant for me, not him.”

  Relief descended on Thayne and the confidence her words inspired made him happier than he’d been in a long time. They were made for each other, and she felt it too.

  He smoothed Laura’s hair ag
ainst her head, gently brushing back the strands caught in her tears, and then kissed her deeply, with as much love as he could put into the one, simple act.

  “I hope you can get over your guilt,” he said, “because you’re right. We’re made for each other. Sometimes things work out the way they’re supposed to. I’m sorry that man killed Brian, and I’m sorry Carl died in a fire, but we’re the sum of our past experiences. Those events led us to each other, and I’m grateful to be right where I am today.”

  She ran her thumb over his eyebrow and caressed his cheek, tenderness in her gaze that made his heart sing with love.

  “You’re right,” she said. “Brian and Carl cared about us, and they would want us to be happy. Hopefully, Bonnie can be happy with Patrick and have a great life, too. Though I imagine getting over you will be hard on her.”

  It was a measure of Laura’s sweet nature that she felt sorry for Bonnie, instead of hating the other woman for trying to lure Thayne away. However, it never would have worked, and it was good that Laura understood now she had nothing to worry about.

  “I do feel bad for other people suffering,” Thayne replied. “But that won’t stop me from having a life with you and being the happiest man on the planet.”

  He kissed her again, his desire for her awakening once more.

  This time, he’d make slow, passionate love to her instead of the frantic, biting, needy experience they’d shared last night. He would show Laura just how much she meant to him.

  And then remind her of it every day for the rest of their lives.

  Chapter Twenty

  It’s just too bad I have to work while Thor is home. Guess he’ll have to play with his own hammer.

  Laura laughed out loud, even though heat rose up her cheeks. Thayne brought out a naughtiness she’d never experienced before. Then again, she sat around feeling guilty for seven years and never had any reason to get naughty.

  Luckily, she was running lab work on a patient, so she sat in the lab with no one around to hear her laughing and ask what about. That would be embarrassing to explain.